Movie Ratings Poster

Snakes, Planes, Luggage, Porn

Me: so, were you in your underwear all day?
JoeJoe: ha – no
JoeJoe: shorts until i realized the basement is cold
Me: hehe
Me: i want a job where i can wear underwear
JoeJoe: and you’re telling me you can’t find that in 5 seconds on google?
Me: hehe
Me: so you, as my consultant, are suggesting i get into internet porn?
JoeJoe: officially, yes
Me: ok, joejoe is the devil consultant on my shoulder
JoeJoe: yay!
JoeJoe: and now you’ve answered the elusive question, what does a consultant do?
Me: hehe, a consultant is a pimp

So tonight I finally went to go see that educational movie on the effects of reptiles on the travel industry. That’s right, two weeks after it was the thing to do, I finally found someone to see Snakes on a Plane with (granted said someone was out of town for weeks) and he got two more people to see it yay!

First I accompanied JoeJoe to Kohls where he bought luggage (no, he didn’t think we were really going on a snake filled plane, he needs it for work. If he thought we were battling snakes he would have bought a machete, duh). He refused to buy the hot pink or the purple or the old lady tapestry print one and settled on boring ole black (side note, you probably should never take me shopping with you as I will spend the whole time pointing out the stupidest things I see). I saw a set of pans I totally want though. It was a Rachael Ray set with cushy orange handles, so cute! Alas, I have no extra income and already have a set of Naked Chef pans.

Anyways, after our shopping trip we headed off to the movie. We got there a bit early and while sitting around I noticed the poster that explained what movie ratings meant:


What Everyone Should Know About Movie Ratings Poster

It kind of made me sad when I saw that the bunny got to watch movies up to PG-13, while the giraffe could only see a G-rated film. It made me lose it when I noticed the strange child molester who showed up in the NC-17 category but apparently was not allowed in any of the other types of movies.

Anyways…so, Joe and I are waiting and we can’t get in touch with MK, and Sarah calls and says she’ll be late and Isla calls and says she’ll be late and Jen calls and says she can’t come. Yup. Luckily Isla and Sarah made it just in time to see the entire film. Although, as Joe put it on the phone with both of them, “I don’t think you’ll miss anything important. The title explains the whole plot.”

Yeah. It pretty much did. Let me tell you, this movie definitely exceeded my expectations for greatness. It was so brilliantly bad it was great. I highly recommend it. Poor Ebert has been undergoing surgery and unfortunately has not reviewed this fine film. I bet he would like it too because he is actually pretty good at liking movies for what they are instead of expecting them all to be Oscar-quality (although I must say, this is so Oscar quality 🙂 )

MILD SPOILER AHEAD: So, near the end of this film and, like every movie involving an incident on a plane, the pilot is dead and they need someone to fly the plane. They choose this one guy to do it saying that he has over 2,000 hours of experience flying. At this point I whisper to JoeJoe that I was disappointed because I thought they were going to say his experience was flying in a video game. At this JoeJoe laughs at me for thinking this. Yup. I was so right. I am so good at guessing the conventions of these films 🙂

Yay! Well me and JoeJoe loved it, not so sure about Sarah and Isla though. And the people in the same row as us at least didn’t seem to find it nearly as entertaining and seemed as if they’d never actually heard of it and saw an ad and just decided to go see a random movie. Hehe.

After the movie Joe and I went to Portillos for dinner where I had to wait a ridiculously long time for my hot dog (I got it plain too, how hard is that?) then went back to his place where MK joined us to watch some TV and torment the doggy.

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Hi, I'm Val. I spent most of my 20s in a standstill, unable to pick which path in life I wanted to take. I wanted the nomadic life of a traveler but also wanted the husband, the condo, and the kitten. Unable to decide which life I wanted more, I did nothing. When I turned 30 I’d had enough of putting my life on hold and decided to start “choosing my figs.” So, I quit my job, bought a one-way ticket to Europe, and traveled for three years. Now I'm back in Chicago, decorating my apartment in all the teal, petting my cats, and planning my next adventure.

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