Choosing Figs | Neurotic as Hell | A Travel, Lifestyle, and Life List Blog

Pink is funny.

This joke is courtesy of dirtntreesChris, in response to my pinkness. It’s a pink joke! I think it has any of MK’s away messages beat 🙂

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Dave is driving down a rural highway late at night. He’s been driving for a long, LONG time, and he’s starting to get REALLY tired, but he is SO far out in the country that there are no hotels or inns ANYWHERE. So finally he decides that he is tired enough to just pull over at the next house and ask to spend the night. He pulls up at a pink house with pink trim, pink shutters, pink windows, and a pink door. He gets out of his car, walks up the pink sidewalk, up the pink driveway, climbs the pink steps, and rings the pink doorbell. A pink lady comes to answer the pink door. Dave explains to her, “Ma’am, I know it’s late, but I’m really tired, and if I could just spend the night, I’d really appreciate it.” The pink lady says, “Sure, no problem! Come on inside! Go up the pink stairs, down the pink hallway, and behind the first pink door on your right you’ll find a pink bedroom. Inside the pink closet are some pink sheets, pink blankets, and pink pillowcases that you can put on the pink bed and the pink pillows. Sleep well!” So Dave steps inside the pink door, walks up the pink steps, down the pink hallway, and opens the first pink door on the right. He walks into the pink bedroom, goes to the pink closet, and takes out the pink blanket, the pink sheets, and the pink pillowcases. He puts the pink sheets and pink blanket on the bed, and the pink pillowcases on the pink pillows. He climbs under the pink covers, turns out the pink light, and falls immediately asleep. Time passes. A second man, Bob, is driving down the same highway. He, too, has been driving for quite some time and desperately needs sleep. But there are no hotels or inns anywhere to be found, so Bob decides to pull over at the next house that comes up. He parks in front of the pink house with pink trim, pink shutters, pink windows, and a pink door. He gets out of his car, walks up the pink sidewalk, up the pink driveway, climbs the pink steps, and rings the pink doorbell. The pink lady comes to answer the pink door. Bob explains to her, “Ma’am, I’m really sorry for ringing your doorbell so late at night, but I’ve been driving for hours and hours, and all I need is to please spend the night?” The pink lady says, “Sure! Come on in! Go up the pink stairs, down the pink hallway, and behind the second pink door on your right you’ll find a pink bedroom. In the pink closet are some pink sheets, pink blankets, and pink pillowcases that you can put on the pink bed and the pink pillows. Sleep well!” So Bob steps inside the pink door, walks up the pink steps, down the pink hallway, and opens the second pink door on the right. He walks into the pink bedroom, goes to the pink closet, and takes out the pink blanket, the pink sheets, and the pink pillowcases. He puts the pink sheets and pink blanket on the bed, and the pink pillowcases on the pink pillows. He climbs under the pink covers, turns out the pink light, and falls immediately asleep. Time passes. A third man, Fred, is driving down the same highway. Like Dave and Bob, Fred has been driving for a long time, only Fred has been driving longer that either Dave or Bob. He can barely keep his eyes open. Because there are no hotels or inns, Fred decides to pull over at the next house. He parks in front of the pink house with pink trim, pink shutters, pink windows, and a pink door. He gets out of his car, walks up the pink sidewalk, up the pink driveway, climbs the pink steps, and rings the pink doorbell. The pink lady comes to answer the pink door. Fred, so tired he can barely speak, manages to stammer out, “Ma’am, I hate to bother you so late at night, but I really need some sleep. Could I stay at your house?” The pink lady says, “Sure! Come on inside! Go up the pink stairs, down the pink hallway, and behind the third pink door on your right you’ll find a pink bedroom. In the pink closet are some pink sheets, pink blankets, and pink pillowcases that you can put on the pink bed and the pink pillows. Sleep well!” So Fred staggers through the pink door, walks up the pink stairs, down the pink hallway, and into the third pink door on the right. He walks into the pink bedroom, goes to the pink closet, and takes out the pink blanket, the pink sheets, and the pink pillowcases. He puts the pink sheets and pink blanket on the bed, and the pink pillowcases on the pink pillows. He climbs under the pink covers, turns out the pink light, and falls immediately asleep. TIME PASSES. The sun rises. Dave wakes up. He climbs out of the pink bed, strips the pink blankets and pink sheets off the pink bed, and takes the pink pillowcases off the pink pillows. He puts the pink blankets, pink sheets, and pink pillowcases into the pink closet, and leaves the pink bedroom. He walks down the pink hallway, down the pink stairs, takes a left, and walks into a pink kitchen with pink cabinets, a pink floor, pink shelves, pink fixtures, and the pink lady, going through the motions of making breakfast. The pink lady says, “Good morning! What would you like for breakfast? We have Rice Krispies or Cheerios.” Dave says, “Cheerios, please.” The pink lady goes to the pink cupboard and takes out a pink bowl. She goes to the pink silverware drawer and takes out a pink spoon. She pours some Cheerios out of a pink box into the pink bowl, goes to the refrigerator and takes out a pink milk carton, pours the milk into the pink bowl and sets the pink bowl and pink spoon in front of Dave. Dave sits down on the pink chair at the pink table and eats his Cheerios. He finishes, thanks the pink lady, goes out of the pink kitchen, out the pink door, down the pink steps, down the pink driveway, down the pink sidewalk, gets into his car and drives away. A little while later, Bob wakes up. He climbs out of the pink bed, strips the pink blankets and pink sheets off the pink bed, and takes the pink pillowcases off the pink pillows. He puts the pink blankets, pink sheets, and pink pillowcases into the pink closet, and leaves the pink bedroom. He walks down the pink hallway, down the pink stairs, takes a left, and walks into a pink kitchen with pink cabinets, a pink floor, pink shelves, pink fixtures, and the pink lady, going through the motions of making breakfast. The pink lady says, “Good morning! What would you like for breakfast? We have Rice Krispies or Cheerios.” Bob says, “Cheerios, please.” The pink lady goes to the pink cupboard and takes out a pink bowl. She goes to the pink silverware drawer and takes out a pink spoon. She pours some Cheerios out of a pink box into the pink bowl, goes to the refrigerator and takes out a pink milk carton, pours the milk into the pink bowl and sets the pink bowl and pink spoon in front of Bob. Bob sits down on the pink chair at the pink table and eats his Cheerios. He finishes, thanks the pink lady, goes out of the pink kitchen, out the pink door, down the pink steps, down the pink driveway, down the pink sidewalk, gets into his car and drives away. Finally, Fred wakes up after a long sleep. He climbs out of the pink bed, strips the pink blankets and pink sheets off the pink bed, and takes the pink pillowcases off the pink pillows. He puts the pink blankets, pink sheets, and pink pillowcases into the pink closet, and leaves the pink bedroom. He walks down the pink hallway, down the pink stairs, takes a left, and walks into a pink kitchen with pink cabinets, a pink floor, pink shelves, pink fixtures, and the pink lady, going through the motions of making breakfast. The pink lady says, “Good morning! What would you like for breakfast? We have Rice Krispies or Cheerios.” Fred says, “Rice Krispies, please.” The pink lady goes to the pink cupboard and takes out a pink bowl. She goes to the pink silverware drawer and takes out a pink spoon. She pours some Rice Krispies out of a pink box into the pink bowl, goes to the refrigerator and takes out a pink milk carton, pours the milk into the pink bowl and sets the pink bowl and pink spoon in front of Fred. Fred sits down on the pink chair at the pink table and eats his Rice Krispies. He finishes, thanks the pink lady, goes out of the pink kitchen, out the pink door, down the pink steps, down the pink driveway, down
the pink sidewalk, gets into his car and drives away. The moral of the story is: Two out of three people prefer Cheerios to Rice Krispies.

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Hi, I'm Val. I spent most of my 20s in a standstill, unable to pick which path in life I wanted to take. I wanted the nomadic life of a traveler but also wanted the husband, the condo, and the kitten. Unable to decide which life I wanted more, I did nothing. When I turned 30 I’d had enough of putting my life on hold and decided to start “choosing my figs.” So, I quit my job, bought a one-way ticket to Europe, and traveled for three years. Now I'm back in Chicago, decorating my apartment in all the teal, petting my cats, and planning my next adventure.

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  • Chris
    June 26, 2007at3:03 pm

    Ah the pink joke. I tell it a bit differently. Mr Blue, Mr Black and Mr. Brown are all driving to the Pink house to meet Mr. Pink, but he’s off on errands, so Mrs. Pink puts them in the pink parlor room while they wait. The main idea of the joke is the same though. Glad ya liked it.

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