At Jen's bachelorette party at Barenaked Lads Take Off Broadway.

Of penises and pirates. (Bachelorette Party at Barenaked Lads Take Off Broadway)

I saw a lot of gay penis last night.

Just gonna throw that out there first so there are no surprises later.

At Jen's bachelorette party at Barenaked Lads Take Off Broadway.

My sister is getting married in a couple of months so last night we had her bachelorette party. The night started at Schuba’s where we had some yummy appetizers (artichoke fritters, potato empanadas, sweet potato fries) and had myself a beer and an apple beer. Jen opened her presents. People gave me money and I didn’t even have to take my clothes off. Good times.


Barenaked Lads Take Off Broadway

Basically the show involves a bunch of gay men…completely naked. Actually they (disappointingly) weren’t completely naked for the entire time…but I guess there is a limit to the amount of time they wanted to devote to the gay male penis. We did get to see them do yoga completely naked and do a clog dancing number completely naked though. Good times. Some of the skits kind of dragged for me, but I liked all of the music. Some were takeoffs (no pun intended) of Broadway shows, such as “Somewhere Obscene” instead of Little Shop’s “Somewhere That’s Green.” There was one really sad song near the end though about a man’s boyfriend dying. That was sad. The rest was happy and penisy though.

After the show we went to get tapas at Cafe Ba Ba Reeba. I love tapas but sometimes it’s annoying with big groups because if you really want something you end up getting a really really small portion of it. And then when everyone else is stuffed at the end and you are still ravishingly hungry…you’re out of luck. It was good though…escargot, bacon-wrapped dates, goat cheese in tomato sauce, chicken fried thingies, garlic potato salad, stuffed mushrooms, raspberry sangria…

After that we went to this bar that I don’t remember the name of. There was dancing but not skeezy dancing. Captain Morgan was there. Seriously, pirate in a bar. He gave out blinky things and free shots of rum and coke. And a bunch of girls were trying to get with him and all I could think was “you know, he’s not the REAL Captain Morgan.” There was this girl there who kept trying to set us up with her friends or something.

Dancing with Captain Morgan at a bachelorette party.

And then we went back to our posh hotel to crash.

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Hi, I'm Val. I spent most of my 20s in a standstill, unable to pick which path in life I wanted to take. I wanted the nomadic life of a traveler but also wanted the husband, the condo, and the kitten. Unable to decide which life I wanted more, I did nothing. When I turned 30 I’d had enough of putting my life on hold and decided to start “choosing my figs.” So, I quit my job, bought a one-way ticket to Europe, and traveled for three years. Now I'm back in Chicago, decorating my apartment in all the teal, petting my cats, and planning my next adventure.

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