
l’un parle bien, l’autre se tait
Getting lost in a park and going on a pub crawl in Sevilla, Spain.
When I’m miserable I can wax poetic about how gut wrenchingly awful I’m feeling. But when I’m happy I seem to just say, “today was awesome” and post a bunch of photos with no explanation.
So maybe I should strive to stay miserable so I will finally finish that novel I keep saying I’m writing.
Or maybe I can just stay happy and learn to write better.
I spent a day wandering Sevilla with no intention of going for as long as I did. But I got lost. It’s inevitable for me. It also seems inevitable that when I get that lost I also realize that my map is gone. I’ve gotten better at reading maps, but only when I actually have one in front of me.
I wandered around a park and when I came out I thought I knew which direction I was facing but it was all wrong. So I first ended up in an area of town I really didn’t think I should be in. And then I retraced my steps but couldn’t find the park again and instead ended up in an area with huge houses turned into banks.
None of it mattered. I didn’t have anything to get back to. I eventually re-found the park and was able to make my way back from there.
At night I went on a pub crawl. It went too slowly though. So unless you paid a lot more you weren’t going to maintain a good steady bar crawl drunk.
The last bar was an open air club that took entirely too long to get to. But it was fun. And I danced with a Sevilla-ian. And a guy from South America who said I was the best dancer there.
And eventually I couldn’t find anyone from my hostel. So I walked home, alone, across town at 5am.
The worst part of traveling alone is that there is no one there to look out for you. No one to make sure you’re with them when they leave the bar. No one to say it’s a really stupid idea to wander the tiny dark streets alone at night. I kept thinking I should be crying. And I kept wanting to cry. x
But I couldn’t.
Because when you’re walking alone and feel like the only person in the world and are the only person standing in front of great monuments that are packed during the day and your shoes are soaked through because big trucks are driving through town spraying down the city, despite anything else, things can be pretty awesome.