Choosing Figs | Neurotic as Hell | A Travel, Lifestyle, and Life List Blog

It’s like cherry cake and pumpkin cake…

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Nad and I went to lunch today. While she was waiting for me to get there she browsed the bookstore and bought me the most awesome book I’ve ever seen: “How to Survive a Horror Movie” Basically, it’s a guide for everything you need to know if you somehow find yourself trapped in a horror movie…with chapters such as “What to do if an evil vehicle wants you dead” “how to tell if you’ve been dead since the beginning of the movie” and “what to do if your corn has children in it.” I can’t wait to read it and get uber prepared…just in case. I have awesome friends who know me so well :)

A phone conversation with MattyK the other day…
Matt: I was wondering when you want to give me all your money?
Me: You call me for the first time in three months and it’s just because you want my business?
Me: I have an extra ticket for Barenaked Lads Take Off Broadway this Friday, wanna go?
Matt: Let me check my calendar.
Me: Umm, did you hear what I said?
Matt: No. What are you seeing?
Me: It’s a bunch of naked men singing.
Matt: I’ll pass.
Me: So not only do you only talk to me when you want my business, but then you don’t even pay attention to what I say?

Since he takes everyone else out to dinner, and tried to pass off office coffee on me, I demanded premium coffee. So we went to Caribou. I feel like Starbucks is going to feel forsaken. 🙁

I again had a campfire mocha because everything is better with marshmallows, and MK let me eat some of his cake…with frosting. mmm He thinks I’m weird when I smell his briefcase. And also that I slip notes into it when he leaves to go buy me coffee. It doesn’t smell like anything though. He told me I should buy lots of cars with my money…or something like that. He also promised I’d be a millionaire in just six short months…or something like that. I told him I would make him not be so serious…and I think I well succeeded. He would not talk to me solely through a moose. 🙁 He would relate things in terms I understand such as pumpkin pie and owning parts of JoeJoe. He gave me a quiz that I think was meant to show me my dream date. Then he stole my soul…or something like that.


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Hi, I'm Val. I spent most of my 20s in a standstill, unable to pick which path in life I wanted to take. I wanted the nomadic life of a traveler but also wanted the husband, the condo, and the kitten. Unable to decide which life I wanted more, I did nothing. When I turned 30 I’d had enough of putting my life on hold and decided to start “choosing my figs.” So, I quit my job, bought a one-way ticket to Europe, and traveled for three years. Now I'm back in Chicago, decorating my apartment in all the teal, petting my cats, and planning my next adventure.

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  • Chris
    June 7, 2007at8:38 am

    You should also check out the Zombie Survival Guide it is also full of good survival tips and tricks.

  • val
    June 7, 2007at9:23 am

    yeah, I already have that one too 🙂

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