It fell behind the bed.

Josh on why it was OK for Will to bake him cookies:

“But he hasn’t had a date in nine months.”

Me on why it was not OK for Will to bake him cookies:

“So, that means he hasn’t done other things with a woman in 9 months, does that make it OK for him to do those with a man?”

***

Last night we went to the Ram bar and not the goat bar and I got a peach tea that’s one of those danger drinks and got an alien ice skater plate and ate bacon cheesey garlic sour cream chips that were yummy because Josh needs bacon.

***

Jack Bauer doesn’t seem like the type to go for all these women with no hair. That’s all I have.

***

Sometimes you go to Caribou to write and put at the top of the blank page a simple question: “Did he ever find that remote control?” And 183 unanswerable questions about your life later, you leave either more confused or more clarified than ever.