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Neurotic As Hell

Choosing Figs Blog

There's a potato-shaped AirBNB in Boise, Idaho. Let me repeat that: there's a potato-shaped AirBNB in Boise, Idaho. I first heard about this spud hotel some months ago when it was doing its viral rounds on all the news outposts. "Sleep in a Giant Potato for Only $200 a Night," "The Ultimate Vegan Airbnb Is a Giant Potato," "Boise’s Potato Airbnb is the Most Idaho Hotel Room Ever," all the click-bait headlines declared. Of course, as soon as I read article after article on these tater digs there was only one thing I could say, "I need to stay there." If you...

It's hard to say that there was really any particular place we were going on this ten-day road trip. We didn't spend more than a night anywhere. We didn't spend much time in any one particular place. Really, we were just driving, making a big ole circle. If there was a "destination," I suppose, it was Boise, Idaho. Boise was to be the furthest west we were going. It was the point where we would turn around and start heading in the direction home. It was halfway through the journey. And it was the home to the potato AirBNB, which was,...

There's nothing between Cheyenne, Wyoming and Salt Lake City, Utah. At least, nothing that I was super excited to see. That's the problem with road trips sometimes. Sometimes there will be twenty things in a short short distance. And, other times, nothing for hours. That's not to say that we didn't see anything on the six and a half hour drive. We stopped in Buford, Wyoming, population one (though I heard that guy moved, so maybe, actually, zero). It's the smallest town in America. And we stopped at the Gunslinger 66 and Tumbleweed Gas Station Town, an old-west style gas station in...

The Sandhills Journey Scenic Byway wasn't originally on our road trip itinerary. The plan was, at first, to drive I-80 the entire way from Omaha, Nebraska, to Cheyenne, Wyoming. About a week before our trip was set to begin, Tim suggested the switch-up, reasoning that it was something different and would be more scenic than the highway. And so, of course, that sent my anxiety-ridden brain into a state of massive panic. We had already decided on the route. I had already mapped out all the stops. I had already crossed "decide on a route" and "map out all the stops" off...

It should have been a short day. The drive from Des Moines, Iowa (where we ended up on day 1 of our ten-day road trip) to Omaha, Nebraska, via I-80 should only take about 2 hours. It's a short drive. An easy drive. But I had made the itinerary. And, when you're with me, no trip is ever short or easy. You see, I had made, what Tim and I came to dub, a "clipboard of fun." After scouring Roadside America to find every roadside attraction on our route, I had mapped out 230 potential stops across the ten-day, ten-state trip. I...

Originally the plan was to go to Idaho so that we could stay in the potato AirBNB in Boise. The potato AirBNB is exactly what it sounds like. A giant potato turned into an AirBNB. I saw articles about it online and posted one to my Facebook timeline. He commented on it, something about wanting to road trip there because Idaho and Wyoming were two of his last three states to check off. I said, "let's go!" and, somehow, we turned it into a real trip. I'd been itching to take a road trip for a while (it was even on...

”Do not anticipate trouble or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.” Benjamin Franklin When I was a child I was afraid of thunderstorms. I was mostly afraid of the lightning, afraid that it would strike my house and burn it down. I didn't know then that the electrical wiring in our basement would take care of that years later. I just knew that those giant claps of light were scary. I knew that lightning was a threat. Do you ever wish for something to happen, pray for it to happen, and it doesn't come to fruition? Do you ever...

I've been living without a car for years now. Really, I don't need a car living in Chicago. During the day I can get anywhere by public transportation. By night, Uber and Lyft are an app swipe away. And, yeah, OK, I've even been known to take a bus home at 3am to save a few as well. Sure, there are times when having a car would make life more convenient. It takes me at least two hours and ten extra dollars to get to anyone in my family by taking two trains (and even then I either have to walk...

At the start of this year, I was going gung ho towards making progress on my New Year's resolutions, my goals. I lost ten pounds by going to the gym three times per week and cutting down on snacks and sugar. I was meal prepping lunches and making my own coffee to spend less money. I was writing a blog post every single week. And then I started losing momentum. It wasn't a slow, heedless, loss of momentum. It happened pretty sharply. In March I was working on a project at work and by the end of the month realized that...

Things my cats have destroyed: Two vases, knocked down from a shelf. A snow globe photo frame that forever left glitter glued to the floor. A candle holder. A Disney Sleeping Beauty mug I'd had since high school. A drinking glass I'd had since college. My bedroom mirror. Numerous rolls of toilet paper. My fig tree and countless other plants. A couple of Food & Wine magazines. A jar of citrus-scented bath salts. A surfing Obama bobble head. The side of my couch. The underside of my box spring. All of my blinds. I'm sure that there are more things that I can't think of right now (or haven't discovered yet). But that's the gist...