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Neurotic As Hell

Choosing Figs Blog

”Do not anticipate trouble or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.” Benjamin Franklin When I was a child I was afraid of thunderstorms. I was mostly afraid of the lightning, afraid that it would strike my house and burn it down. I didn't know then that the electrical wiring in our basement would take care of that years later. I just knew that those giant claps of light were scary. I knew that lightning was a threat. Do you ever wish for something to happen, pray for it to happen, and it doesn't come to fruition? Do you ever...

I've been living without a car for years now. Really, I don't need a car living in Chicago. During the day I can get anywhere by public transportation. By night, Uber and Lyft are an app swipe away. And, yeah, OK, I've even been known to take a bus home at 3am to save a few as well. Sure, there are times when having a car would make life more convenient. It takes me at least two hours and ten extra dollars to get to anyone in my family by taking two trains (and even then I either have to walk...

At the start of this year, I was going gung ho towards making progress on my New Year's resolutions, my goals. I lost ten pounds by going to the gym three times per week and cutting down on snacks and sugar. I was meal prepping lunches and making my own coffee to spend less money. I was writing a blog post every single week. And then I started losing momentum. It wasn't a slow, heedless, loss of momentum. It happened pretty sharply. In March I was working on a project at work and by the end of the month realized that...

Things my cats have destroyed: Two vases, knocked down from a shelf. A snow globe photo frame that forever left glitter glued to the floor. A candle holder. A Disney Sleeping Beauty mug I'd had since high school. A drinking glass I'd had since college. My bedroom mirror. Numerous rolls of toilet paper. My fig tree and countless other plants. A couple of Food & Wine magazines. A jar of citrus-scented bath salts. A surfing Obama bobble head. The side of my couch. The underside of my box spring. All of my blinds. I'm sure that there are more things that I can't think of right now (or haven't discovered yet). But that's the gist...

A few weeks ago I took a random Monday off from work. I'm actually pretty terrible at taking my vacation days off. I always feel like I need to save them up for big trips that I never end up taking or to get paid out for if I ever find a new job. So I never end up taking those one-off me days, three day weekends, or time off just for the hell of it. It just feels like I'm wasting those vacation days to take them for no reason. You know? But then, in April, I literally worked the...

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]I write a lot about bucket lists, whether I'm checking off big life goals of my own (like backpacking through Europe, taking a hot air ballon ride, or throwing tomatoes at La Tomatina) or crafting inspirational lists of bucket list ideas. Let's just say, I love a good to-do list. But that's the thing. Lists. We all love making big dreamy lists of things we want to accomplish in life. But we tend to ignore that other half of the string: the bucket. The bucket is just as essential to the bucket list as the list is, but we tend to only...

"I don't have time to be sick." I muttered that to myself when I woke up last Monday with a fire burning in my throat, chills running through my belly, clogged nostrils, and lungs swimming with phlegm. I didn't have time to be sick. I had a couple of meetings that I didn't want to reschedule. I had a looming deadline for a major project I'm leading. I had a million-item-long personal to-do list. I had a weekend full of plans ahead. I had goals that weren't ready to be put on hold. But, I suppose, sick doesn't care about any of those...

I've always had a tumultuous relationship with my body. It was my body that stood in the way of me being a dancer because no matter how hard or often I stretched it, it refused to get more flexible. It was my body that rejected sex and refused to let me lose my virginity (that is a story for another day). And now, it is my body that is making me feel ashamed, ugly, uninspired. I know, I know, I'm supposed to be "body positive." I'm supposed to reject what the media says bodies should look like. To embrace my figure....

February was short, 28 days, but it felt, in many ways, much longer. February is always a weird month, a transition from gung-ho January into the reality of a new year. Over the last month, I feel like I got a little more lax with my "diet," it got a little harder to get up before sunrise to get myself to the gym. I mean, when you wake up, daily, to this, it's hard to want to get out of bed and leave your apartment. And, with the freezing Chicago weather, it's also been really hard to not want to spend the...

I've been working on my bad habits. One of those bad habits is soda. I drink a lot of soda. Mostly, Coca-Cola. I hate to admit how bad my addiction is, but I would drink Coke at least once a day but, usually, more often than not, two or three times a day. I've been doing good though, with cutting it out. In January I only had two Cokes in total and, instead, drank mostly water and sparkling flavored waters like Spindrift or Waterloo. I've also been working on my habit of biting my nails. I've bitten my nails for my whole life. The...